Being married with children, going to school and work can be very stressful. I experience this personally because I live this on a daily basis. Everyday there is a deadline that must be met whether it is work, school or personal and they are all important. How do we cope? How do we prioritize and manage our time to fit everything in? How does it affect us mentally and physically? Why do we choose to go to school when our lives are already so full of responsibilities?
I experience some kind of stress every day, but today was one of those days. I woke up this morning to get my daughter off to school and she wasn’t feeling well. I also had to go to work. I work several times a month cleaning a house which you would not think it would be as stressful as a full time job, but it always seems that something will happen on these days I do work that makes it a start to a stressful day. It could be I really need to study for a test or an assignment that has to be complete before the next class or a personally issue will arise. Therefore I feel the pressure of trying to get everything done. I did manage to go to work, trying to rush through so I could get back home to check on my daughter, but I also had to go to the grocery store. It was late mid afternoon before I got home and then had to prepare dinner, do laundry and homework. I get it done, but sometimes it means late nights resulting in less sleep.
What drives me to persevere is motivation. I am dedicated to my decision to return to college and focused on the outcome for my future. The support I receive from family, friends and my instructors also keeps me going. I can do this!
I have talked with other students of my age and we agree that our motivation is also driven from the desire to complete our education. When we were younger we wanted to continue our education, but things happened. We may had fell in love and married early assuming we will continue our education once married, but then it is a concern of finances to take care of ourselves, work, and then we had children. The thought that education was not important at the time was another factor. We also agreed that the consequences of not going to college after high school made life harder. First of all job searching is difficult because most jobs require some type of college education. Another factor is that education today has advanced since we had attended school; to help our children with homework is difficult and for me I find this discouraging. Being older and learning from our mistakes makes it essential to correct the wrong and pursue what we intentional wanted when we were young. You are never too old to learn. In fact if you do not use your mind, you lose it!
My research confirms that there is stress related to adult students with family and work responsibilities. Going back to school creates another domain in competition with their already established lives. Balancing these roles is physically and emotionally stressful. Compared to traditional students, adult responsibilities added to school can lead to a heavy amount stress and role conflict. Depending on the adult students’ context, it can either elevate or hinder their learning expectations.
Studies conducted showed that adult students reported the biggest conflict role was with school and family. I can relate to this because there have been times where I was conflicted between involving myself in a family activity versus a must do school assignment. It is extremely difficult especially when your child wants quality time with you the very moment you are deeply involved in a school assignment.
There are however positive ways of handling this by planning the time for family and school. Planning ahead makes life much easier for me. Making a schedule that includes family time everyday is important. Sometimes just going to the grocery store together can create quality family time and it is a winning situation for me because I am engaging in two essential roles at the same time.
Work was reported as a significant stressor for adult students as well. Whereas we can have some control over school and family, work there is less control. This makes sense because you can prioritize your schedule accordingly for school and family most of the time. Work on the other hand, controls your livelihood. This is your finances being affected by your work performance. We can negotiate our family and social demands but that doesn’t work as effectively in the workplace. However, the roles between school and family remain the biggest obstacle for the adult student.
In conclusion, balancing life between these three domains is essential for one emotionally and physically health. Stress can be relieved in a positive way by exercise, engaging in a family oriented activities and keeping up with your school work load.
Works Cited
Giancola, J.,et al. (2009). Dealing with the stress of college: A model for adult students. Adult Education Quarterly, 59(3), 246-263. Retrieved October 22, 2010 from Academic Search Complete database.